My dearest, my beloved, my life-long friend:
So, I finally found the motivation to look at our site and write a bit of something, and what do I find but the words that you left two weeks ago that were exactly what I needed to hear on THIS day. Funny, how we work, together. I don’t know what universal force made it so that we would be in each others lives, but I thank them wholeheartedly for you every day.
I’ve always been envious of how you live in the moment; how you are yourself, no matter what; how you take on the world, on your own terms, and never compromise your beliefs.
I only ever wanted to fit in this crazy world, you never tried to.
And, so, I am struggling to figure out who I am again, still, a full three years after my life blew up. One day, I think I’ve got things figured out and the world is spread out at my feet. The next, I don’t have a clue and I am in the depths of despair (I find that a little throw-back to Anne of Green Gables always works in these situations).
Just when I think I’m grateful for my corporate job, I find myself missing my retail job. I loved the crazy hours, my crazier co-workers, the events we hosted and the great conversations I had with people every single day. Now I sit in a cubicle 8 hours a day and work on a computer. It’s easy to forget the reason I left retail – the crummy pay, hurting 110% more than I would normally (and that’s a LOT), and nights and weekends away from my kids. Now that I write that, I realize I don’t miss working in retail, but I do miss the feeling brought on by working around books for 40 hours a week.
Actually, it was probably the idea that there were so many crappy books out there that I could maybe write a better one that got me writing again.
Well, how’s that for distillation of an idea in action. Ha!
So, life goes on. And, I pick up my writing where I left off a few months ago.
Apropos of nothing, do you know how much I love Thanksgiving and Christmas? The holidays never measure up to what I’ve got in my head, but I sure try. This year, the kids and I went to my brother’s and had German Thanksgiving (I realize that’s not really a thing) with my mother. I made Oktoberfest beef roast, potatoes, sausage, perogies, red cabbage, smoked turkey, and spaetzle. Add to that German beer and sparkling wine, and you have a party! We watched Death Becomes Her and The Princess Bride.
Remember what I said about the holidays never measuring up? Thanksgiving was actually AWESOME this year.
And, now, my apartment is decorated for Christmas, and I can look forward to being disappointed in my children’s reactions to their presents. (I jest. But, not really.)
I’m sooooooo looking forward to seeing you in December. Write soon, and I promise to write back sooner. I’m still willing to do the writing challenge thing – so let me know when you post your challenge.